This year...

This year:

I am going to have a passionate, all embracing, fully possessive relationship.

Love and care from many fans and friends in my life.

All the riches my heart desires.

A strong connection with source that will be with me to love and guide me always.

Motivating work that inspires me.

On developing love!

Oh what a weekend--3 parties. Lots of great contacts and learning both on the professional and personal front. Professionally learning which folks are great resources for learning and connecting. Several folks for follow up chats and interviewing for the other blog.

Personally--at first party bad feeling vibration to someone's actions which I quickly cut short. Understood the guy was using pick up artist moves and look towards him with compassion and belief in his being better. Or not, but it doesn't affect me as its not about me and I choose not the focus on it. At another party someone I really liked trying to hook me up with someone else. Felt really weird about it and realized thru someone else's feedback that I appeared annoyed. At this point even that feedback feels great because now I know exactly what areas of rapport I have to focus my efforts on learning in terms of outside action with inside inner change. Love someone and enjoy them, not be annoyed by who they are. Love will grow deeper as time goes by but sensing its lack isn't what will get me there. Thank you source for this expansion and learning. I feel the manifestation is coming!

Now I will focus on my professional goals. Blog about those ideas of marketing and strategy that I feel strongly within me. Give a written voice to those ideas I believe so strongly within me. I know and feel them coming.

Refining my worldview

This morning I lay in bed for a while not wanting to wake up and deal with a world where everyone is out to snake each other. I was trying to get my scared little heart to the right place for having the courage to wake up, do yoga, and attend a 9am webinar I wanted to attend. Somewhere around 8:30am, my higher self reminded me that the worldview that my mind was following was my source of suffering rather than the world itself. My worldview was preventing me from feeling okay enough to go and create beautiful abundant things. I repeated to myself thoughts about the greatness of God and the beauty he makes possible for me. I told myself that he is my one and only source of succor and the only one I turn to for help and instantly I felt better. I felt less forlorn and much more at ease. By the time I started the webinar I felt open to whatever amazing learning was going to come my way.

The result was marvelous. Not only was the webinar more interestingly presented but it gave me lots of inspiration. Not only did I receive inspiration of specific steps to take but I also received a more overarching realization. The realization was that I had started following the paths of others. While I learned a lot about business, people’s behaviors, and negotiation in the process, I had lost sight of a greater goal--of creating systems that are independent of me, inspire me, and make me revenue. This goal was somehow lost among a world of hustlers who call themselves independent consultants.

There are many good things to be said about hustling independent consultants. They have the stills to pitch in any and all situations, they provide a lot of free value to gain revenue and traction, and since they are constantly looking out for projects they are in a good position to learn about new market flows and directions. At the same time however they spend a lot of time trying to win clients (often for small deals) and thus drop the ball on delivery and expectations. Their focus on the consulting engagement often forces them to work on a frantic pace that prevents focus on other startup projects that aren’t currently paying. Consulting is therefore not a sustainable way to create a revenue system outside of oneself, at least not if you don’t have a stable income stream already.

So from now on, I am focusing on developing my own brand. Be it with my blog and social media presence as well as talk of my startup life. I will also try and get set up in a full-time job for a few months to grow my skill sets in areas I deem important. These new goals will definitely give me more direction.

Wish me luck.

Feelings and the higher part of me…

I’ve been thinking a lot about connection with the divine part of me, that source energy that pervades all humanity, and connects it. I’ve also been thinking about what it feels like to be connected with it and what actions/thoughts take away that connection. Feeling becomes a very important indicator in this path. I’ve found that the simplest way to live that connection is to live with that which comes as feeling, stay with it long enough to understand it, release it, and reorient towards values and goals. When I am truly conscious of the higher part of myself, the higher part of me is conscious in-turn of the gratification focused exchanges and actions that move me away from the relationships I’d like to create. Sometimes however I must live the contrast to truly know that work, because the higher part of myself learns and grows through contrast. And that answer keeps changing across situations and times of spiritual development.

But the higher part of me knows all, although sometimes it doesn’t tell me. It wants me to figure out that which is my truest answer. The last verse of Rumi’s poem “Medicine out of pain” aptly describes this seeming paradox:

“I tell everything, but I do not say it,
Because, my friend, it is better
Your secret be spoken by you.”

Powerfully changing how we learn

There is a part of our brain that filters various forms of stimulation and creates a subset of stimuli we pay attention to. What we pay attention to often determines our path towards successfully accomplishing our goals or not. Learning occurs when we choose to reorient out thinking to different kinds of stimuli than we were before.

Three things help reorient our filtering system:
1. the need you feel at a specific point in time. Ex. if you feel pain you usually try to attribute your pain to something that causes the pain
2. Your view of yourself and the world
3. Goals that are in our conscious awareness due to your thinking about them

The more we choose to clarify what we want the more we will notice what behavior and actions take us closer towards those wants and what detracts from them. We can then eliminate the behaviors that take us away from our goals and increase the behaviors that take us towards them. This is a much more powerful and fast way of learning than ignoring the score increases and decreases of our actions and waiting for large external indicators or an authority to tell us what works best.