http://www.nytimes.com/2009/
Showing posts with label Islam. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Islam. Show all posts
Monday, April 27, 2009
Money and fun with bondage in Pakistan
A friend sent me a beautiful heartwarming tale of entrepreneurial success and pushing of boundaries in Karachi, the city I am from. Be sure to watch the embedded video if you get time
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/04/28/world/asia/28fetish.html?_r=1&emc=eta1
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/
Thursday, April 23, 2009
My criticism of a criticism of a criticism
This morning I awoke to an email from an Australian living in Pakistan asking me to comment on her controversial piece titled in Defence of Muslim Women. Now I love Danielle, but I think some of her writing on Pakistan does not help raise Pakistani consciousness or even that of the west about it. Below is my comment to her piece. I feel bad that my tone is harsh but it needed to be so.
I respect you a lot but I think some of your points here are just as misguided as the Western criticism. My thoughts:
-many Pakistani women do feel oppressed by the scarf wearing--associations, heat, sense of loss of freedom. This does not come from western influence, it comes from the cultural push by some segments to do this to others who don't accept it. The issue becomes whose version of Islam are you following.
-You use a US example of a broken society due to lack of punishment for illicit extramarital relations. First off Europe has similar laws and way fewer pregnancies. Researchers says this is because US sexual education preaches abstinence rather than birth control as in many ways the US is puritan. Thinking of US as puritan is hard for those in Pakistan. When my mother visited here some of her aunty circle asked if people in the US have sex on the streets! Just as the west gets a warped perspective of Pakistan, Pakistan gets one heck of a warped perspective on the US.
-If it were just this warped perspective on sex I wouldn't care, but what does bother me is that in doing so we often leave out everything that is constructive. This includes the quintessential US belief in being able to get what one wants if one puts in the hard work. Very different than the feeling that things from outside (your government, other governments, the electric company and everything else Pakistanis complain about) drive your reality. By the way isn't that a key tenant of Islam--faith and belief in one's own power to improve things.
-There are a lot of human right violations that go on in that so called Muslim country. These have existed pre-terrorism rise and continue to do so today. You yourself complain about these but do not tap into the stillness of mind that would make them instructive for you and your readers. Instead you try to combat it with resistant negative thought. God's reality is that such negatively keeps one locked in the same patterns.
In the segment of US society I live in, everyday people wake up and plan/execute how to make their lives and those of others more improved, enthusiastic and beautiful, through their work. I recognize this is not all of the US. But what thoughts do most people in Pakistan wake up with? Let me read the news and feel bad about the hue and cry of the world? Let me drown in feelings of anger and self-pity? Wouldn't it be better to take a step back and actively teach yourself and others how to be more positive and thus change you life and those of others. May be you already do this. But if so why aren't you writing about it? Why is it that I never see stories of more than doom and gloom from Pakistan. Unlike what political and mulana propoganda in Pakistan teaches you, self-justification and righteousness is not the path of faith; changing and improving systems and structures is.
When I have said this in the past people have told me that I do not understand Pakistan and the forces it must deal with. I will be bold and say something I often feel but don't let out. I think all you who call yourself Muslims do not understand your faith. The prophet's life was about bringing change to oppressive systems. Not justifying them. If you call yourself muslims and love him, then follow his example in whatever small way you can. Complaining about the state of the world and other's criticism is not one of those ways.
I respect you a lot but I think some of your points here are just as misguided as the Western criticism. My thoughts:
-many Pakistani women do feel oppressed by the scarf wearing--associations, heat, sense of loss of freedom. This does not come from western influence, it comes from the cultural push by some segments to do this to others who don't accept it. The issue becomes whose version of Islam are you following.
-You use a US example of a broken society due to lack of punishment for illicit extramarital relations. First off Europe has similar laws and way fewer pregnancies. Researchers says this is because US sexual education preaches abstinence rather than birth control as in many ways the US is puritan. Thinking of US as puritan is hard for those in Pakistan. When my mother visited here some of her aunty circle asked if people in the US have sex on the streets! Just as the west gets a warped perspective of Pakistan, Pakistan gets one heck of a warped perspective on the US.
-If it were just this warped perspective on sex I wouldn't care, but what does bother me is that in doing so we often leave out everything that is constructive. This includes the quintessential US belief in being able to get what one wants if one puts in the hard work. Very different than the feeling that things from outside (your government, other governments, the electric company and everything else Pakistanis complain about) drive your reality. By the way isn't that a key tenant of Islam--faith and belief in one's own power to improve things.
-There are a lot of human right violations that go on in that so called Muslim country. These have existed pre-terrorism rise and continue to do so today. You yourself complain about these but do not tap into the stillness of mind that would make them instructive for you and your readers. Instead you try to combat it with resistant negative thought. God's reality is that such negatively keeps one locked in the same patterns.
In the segment of US society I live in, everyday people wake up and plan/execute how to make their lives and those of others more improved, enthusiastic and beautiful, through their work. I recognize this is not all of the US. But what thoughts do most people in Pakistan wake up with? Let me read the news and feel bad about the hue and cry of the world? Let me drown in feelings of anger and self-pity? Wouldn't it be better to take a step back and actively teach yourself and others how to be more positive and thus change you life and those of others. May be you already do this. But if so why aren't you writing about it? Why is it that I never see stories of more than doom and gloom from Pakistan. Unlike what political and mulana propoganda in Pakistan teaches you, self-justification and righteousness is not the path of faith; changing and improving systems and structures is.
When I have said this in the past people have told me that I do not understand Pakistan and the forces it must deal with. I will be bold and say something I often feel but don't let out. I think all you who call yourself Muslims do not understand your faith. The prophet's life was about bringing change to oppressive systems. Not justifying them. If you call yourself muslims and love him, then follow his example in whatever small way you can. Complaining about the state of the world and other's criticism is not one of those ways.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Faith a constant journey in refocusing our energy towards belief in betterment from focusing on its lack
This morning I feel much better. I realized that before my acknowledgement of how my behavior was painful to others and not from source I was spending lots of energy maintaining my beliefs that what I was doing was needed and fun. This reminded me very much of A. I lived with A and his wife in exchange for work on their startup recently.
A is an ex-Israeli army officer. Many times his viewpoints about people, life, and the need for violence depressed me to my very core. Furthermore he focused a lot on violence. Violence in the past, violence in the present. Conflict between groups. The stupidity of action of one group that forced the other to retaliate. Life in A's home was constant talk of violence, pain, and suffering. His view of history was one of centuries of Jewish suffering and the inability to have a home. The most salient in his mind of the aggressors were the Muslims. Under his view there was no period of peace for Jews under Muslim rule (interestingly most Christain covert atrocities such as career and social limitations under Christain rule like forbidding Jews to all professions but usury and shunning them in society for it, was not in his mind an atrocity; I guess its to hard to maintain more than one demon).
The interesting thing about A was that he desired to change the world by creating an online community of openness and positivity where organic food, environmentally friendly practices, and spirituality were discussed. This vision was obviously at conflict with his worldview of depression, anxiety, and anger about the world and certain groups. But this was not obvious to him. He spent several hours working on his community daily. But breaks were always taken up by news and talk of news. At times he would invite friends to practice singing and guitar playing but even then his strong thoughts about world affairs and Muslim extremism almost always came up. My guess is these views were also the reason why he felt justified in scaring people and pressuring them, particularly those who had strong ideas of what they want to do. These tactics were again was in conflict with a more peaceful side of him that he also tried to aspire for.
Living with A was hard. But in hindsight I can feel great compassion for his suffering. I feel compassion for the suffering his resistant non-source thoughts formed within him. I also feel compassion for the suffering he felt from the constant internal tug of war within him. This war was between the hope and belief in the coming of what he has asked source and the constant talk of the lack of what he wants.
Its interesting how easy it is for me to see this now for someone else's issues. But really I do the same thing. And so do you. Faith is not a destination. It is a constant practice in believing in our powers of conscious creation and focusing on them solely while letting go of the resistant thoughts. May God help me and you in this journey.
A is an ex-Israeli army officer. Many times his viewpoints about people, life, and the need for violence depressed me to my very core. Furthermore he focused a lot on violence. Violence in the past, violence in the present. Conflict between groups. The stupidity of action of one group that forced the other to retaliate. Life in A's home was constant talk of violence, pain, and suffering. His view of history was one of centuries of Jewish suffering and the inability to have a home. The most salient in his mind of the aggressors were the Muslims. Under his view there was no period of peace for Jews under Muslim rule (interestingly most Christain covert atrocities such as career and social limitations under Christain rule like forbidding Jews to all professions but usury and shunning them in society for it, was not in his mind an atrocity; I guess its to hard to maintain more than one demon).
The interesting thing about A was that he desired to change the world by creating an online community of openness and positivity where organic food, environmentally friendly practices, and spirituality were discussed. This vision was obviously at conflict with his worldview of depression, anxiety, and anger about the world and certain groups. But this was not obvious to him. He spent several hours working on his community daily. But breaks were always taken up by news and talk of news. At times he would invite friends to practice singing and guitar playing but even then his strong thoughts about world affairs and Muslim extremism almost always came up. My guess is these views were also the reason why he felt justified in scaring people and pressuring them, particularly those who had strong ideas of what they want to do. These tactics were again was in conflict with a more peaceful side of him that he also tried to aspire for.
Living with A was hard. But in hindsight I can feel great compassion for his suffering. I feel compassion for the suffering his resistant non-source thoughts formed within him. I also feel compassion for the suffering he felt from the constant internal tug of war within him. This war was between the hope and belief in the coming of what he has asked source and the constant talk of the lack of what he wants.
Its interesting how easy it is for me to see this now for someone else's issues. But really I do the same thing. And so do you. Faith is not a destination. It is a constant practice in believing in our powers of conscious creation and focusing on them solely while letting go of the resistant thoughts. May God help me and you in this journey.
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Polygamy in Islam
My current boyfriend is passionately pro-polygamy and wants me to agree to him engaging in it post marriage. In recent months this topic has led to lots of emotional and mental salsa—one step forward, one step back. It goes like this: I share that monogamy is non-negotiable factor for me and that something otherwise take me away from the vision of life that I want to create for myself. At times when he sees my pain at the thought of having to leave him for his polygamous views, he says he has given the idea up. But at other times he returns to his original viewpoint and tries to convince me of the many ways in which polygamy will add to his life and mine.
Key to his viewpoint is the belief that polygamy is permitted in Islam. He says that as a progressive Muslim I must accept polygamy as valid. To him progressive Muslims should accept polygamy for we say we live by the following principal:
“We recognize the full diversity of Islamic traditions and the free participation therein as a sincere expression of faith.”
To me this argument is a gross misjudgment of what it means to be a progressive Muslim for another principle of progressive Islam is:
“We recognize critical reasoning and dynamic engagement with Islamic scripture and prevailing Islamic practices as an expression of devotion to, and esteem for, Islam and humanity.”
But even before we consider a cerebral argument regarding which values one adopts by affiliating with a religion or a progressive stream within a religion we should consider our inner emotional and mental clarity. We should ask ourselves: What values and decisions make me feel good? Make me feel empowered, loved, and justly dealt with? If values, words, thoughts, or behaviors feel oppressive or preventative of our free will we are keeping ourselves away from self-realization by giving them credence.
Key to his viewpoint is the belief that polygamy is permitted in Islam. He says that as a progressive Muslim I must accept polygamy as valid. To him progressive Muslims should accept polygamy for we say we live by the following principal:
“We recognize the full diversity of Islamic traditions and the free participation therein as a sincere expression of faith.”
To me this argument is a gross misjudgment of what it means to be a progressive Muslim for another principle of progressive Islam is:
“We recognize critical reasoning and dynamic engagement with Islamic scripture and prevailing Islamic practices as an expression of devotion to, and esteem for, Islam and humanity.”
But even before we consider a cerebral argument regarding which values one adopts by affiliating with a religion or a progressive stream within a religion we should consider our inner emotional and mental clarity. We should ask ourselves: What values and decisions make me feel good? Make me feel empowered, loved, and justly dealt with? If values, words, thoughts, or behaviors feel oppressive or preventative of our free will we are keeping ourselves away from self-realization by giving them credence.
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