As I have heard people's judgments about how my behaviors in relationships are neediness I have alternated from pain, anxiety, to redissecting the pain and now finally to this new awareness that judgments come from the judger's personal filters. They also come from the judger's need to disengage and feel self-righteous his or her decisions. That being said understanding how others view my expression of needs is instructive. It has taught me that its not just the way of communication that is in the making of healthy individuals in healthy relationships, it is also the desire to work things out. All the small details. How to communicate. How to love. And lots of self-sacrifice.
Judging another and letting go is the easy path. Trying to make things work even if in the end you decide you cannot. Now that is hard.
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